Mother of Pearl

 

I am healing my teeth.  

My whole life I have worried about them. The fear came into my dreams. I dreamed they were loose and fell into my hands, one by one. I dreamed they were porcupine quills. I kept my mouth closed, turned away from the mirror. The dentist’s office was a virtual torture chamber. I broke out in a cold sweat,  my blood pressure shot up. Once a dentist refused to pull a tooth until I had brought the levels down.  Did he think I was going to have a heart attack? It made them nervous. The mere touch of their cold metal tools sent an electrical charge through me. Give me more anesthesia,  more  laughing gas, or put me out…

I was told it was in my genes and the DNA was fixed. I believed this. Both my parents have suffered from tooth decay. My grandfather went into severe depression because of his ‘bad’ teeth. He was told they had to be removed, every last one. Dentists were on a mission to rearrange my mouth.  Every time I went I lost more teeth. It was like taking a car to the mechanics where they keep finding more problems the more they take apart. It was costing me more money than I could make. I felt trapped. I thought: either I lose all my teeth, or I go through endless procedures, extractions, root canals, bone grafts. I put my trust in dentists. There was a young man, just out of dental school. He had a scar on his cheek. He was very calm and gentle. He prescribed antibiotics. He wanted more x-rays. I said no. I asked him: is there anything else I can do? No, he said. Is there anything I can change? No. So, you see the mouth as separate from the body? Yes. We looked into each other’s eyes, and I knew he could not heal me.

That was it. A whole lifetime of mouth body separation. I mourn my lost teeth, ghost limbs. I mourn the way I treated them. They were cowering little animals and I turned away.  I let people tamper with them, torture them. Sweet and fierce little beings. Forgive me.

I wish it well, this construct of my mind, an old song. It was just something I thought was true. I say goodbye.  I close that door and open another.

This view is endless and breathtaking. The observer affects what is observed. It is my eye that is seeing. For seven days now I have omitted all sugar and wheat. I eat a diet rich in bone broths, local meat, fish, raw milk, feta cheese, yoghurt, vegetables, as close to the earth as possible. I eat eggshells. I brush my teeth with charcoal, salt and baking soda. I pull coconut oil through my teeth every morning. I meditate and visualize. I sing to my teeth.

My teeth are alive. What a stunning revelation. The mouth is a portal, the threshold between the inner and outer worlds. It is a sanctuary, an amphitheatre where the voice is heard. It is survival. Our ancestors had teeth strong enough to break bone. In fact I witnessed this in Africa. People used their teeth as tools. They had beautiful white teeth.  I was adopted by a family in Mali. Their name, ‘Diarra’, comes from the old proverb, ‘Diarra kolo ba kari’ meaning, ‘the lion breaks bones with his teeth’.

 

These are the results of my teeth healing after 7 days:

  1. I sleep well and deeply.
  2. My mind is clear and focused. Everything seems more real. My awareness is heightened.
  3. My depression and anxiety have dissipated.
  4. My senses are stronger. I can taste food. I can smell. I can see and hear better.
  5. My eyes are not filmy, itchy or swollen. The whites of my eyes are brighter.
  6. My skin is radiant, more elastic.
  7. My joints no longer ache. (I used to wake up straining my muscles to relieve the tension.) I am not clenching my jaw.
  8.  My lungs are clear. There is no more burning, or coughing. I can breathe deeply again. (And I smoke tobacco.)
  9. On day 3-5 I had headaches and phlegm, and my back broke out in hives. I was dizzy. This is now disappearing.
  10. I have an incredible thirst for water.
  11. I am calm.
  12. My teeth grow whiter every day. The translucency is being filled with white. I can see the white descending across my teeth. They feel stronger. They no longer ache. The teeth in my mouth now feel like a whole. They are all connected and working together on the same frequency.